Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
Walked in on my roommate covering his dick in blue frosting. Am staying with my folks for the Forth. See you Monday if the brain bleach works.
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
Randomize
