Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll.
i just used shampoo as lube. why? because i'm worth it.
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
You've got to be fucking kidding me. Do you think "Husband drunkenly pees all over floors" is reasonable grounds for divorce? So pissed off right now.
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
Don't let me publish my memoir unless "hurt my ankle drunk irish dancing" is at least the title of a chapter because that is really the whole story of my life.
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
Randomize
