Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
I gotta stop tellin complete strangers at the bar that they're the godparents to my first born
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
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