So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
She cheated on me with the same state trooper that wrote me a ticket.
I guess now you have a way to keep your license when you bring that up in court.
Dude, you are the most awesome.
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
I just went on etsy and my personalized suggestions on the page were either kinky sex restraints or baby things. I feel like etsy just summarized my life.
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
Randomize
