In honor of tonight, my penis will make an appearance
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
My masturbation fantasy just had a wedding theme. I need new hobbies.
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
Randomize
