I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like running into your ex boyfriend at the liquor store at 3 in the afternoon.
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
Randomize
