you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize
