I think I'm going to be in trouble for sneaking out last night. My Dad saw me drive up this morning when he was leaving early for work.
What'd you say?
I told him I was sleep driving
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
One of my bosses just told me she's having communication problems because mercury is in retrograde this month. I think she's serious.
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
Got robbed by an ATM. My weekend officially sucks.
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
Randomize
