how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
If he knew how badly I want to blow him he’d stop talking about his wife
Randomize