How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
To the person who left a cup of vomit in the bathroom: I commend you for your aim but you are dead to me- not an ideal birthday present.
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
I think your dad took our porno
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
