wanna go halves on a baby?
I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
Randomize