your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
after the first blizzard, i went out and bought a thirty and put it in a cooler and hid it out in the backyard. now the second blizzard has deposited 2 feet of snow on top of said cooler. there is a shovel and treasure map over here waiting for you
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
Apparently I whispered "Jesus was here" and bailed out of the moving taxi.
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
EW FUCK GROSS GODDAMMIT I WENT DOWNSTAIRS AND MY GODDAMN BROTHER WAS FINGERING SOME GIRL ON THE FLOOR DOESN'T HE KNOW HE FUCKING LIVES WITH PEOPLE
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
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