So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
Tom just texted me he's Tindering from his hospital bed while they're running heart tests on him.
That's dedication to the game.
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
Randomize
