She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
Awesome, the library of congress archived all tweets. Now my great great grandchildren can pinpoint the date they inherited alcoholism.
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
My mom purposely got me drunk so I can stay at her house bc "we don't spend enough time together." I blacked out anyway, so we didn't spend time together regardless.
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