so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
I just walked in on my roommate beating off with no pants on, an unbuttoned hawaiian shirt and a cowboy hat, and he weights 300 pounds
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
Just flooded the bathroom while masturbating in the shower. Managed to squeege most of it up. Desperately need to get laid.
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
Randomize
