Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
I think I just broke my ankle. I've only had one beer. I'm getting drunk before I go to the ER so it's less embarassing.
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Randomize
