The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
