i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
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