Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
We didn't have a blender for the margaritas, so she tried to use the garbage disposal and wasted half a handle of my grandpa's good tequila.
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
Randomize
