This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
His housemate was playing a sad violin solo for me on my way out. God I hate musicians.
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
Walked into the bathroom and saw a Minion eating out Harley Quinn so this Halloween will be hard to top.
Randomize