I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
I woke up to a quacking alarm clock and a rando in my bed. I told him I liked his cargo shorts. Fireball is not my soulmate anymore.
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
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