i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
The only way that night could have gotten any better would be if a unicorn would descend from the heavens with a nacho bell grande in a bag around its horn beat boxing Hakunah Matata.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
Randomize
