found an unmarked box of photos in the garage, they were from when my parents first got together. It was fun laughing at their ridiculous eighties outfits and hairstyles, until I found a pic of my dad. naked. with a boner.
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
Randomize
