told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
Randomize
