sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
Seriously, stop peeing all over the toilet seat. It looks like movie theatre butter.
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
Randomize
