Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
remember that night jesus turned water into wine? DRUNKER.
took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
Randomize
