508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
Where did you get a picture of my penis
I'm giving you permission to use the abortion money to pay for your DUI.
Why are all the lights on in my house? Every single one. Someone should turn them off but I'm the only one here and I'm sure as hell not doin it.
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
Randomize
