Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
I needed to borrow my dads nail clippers and next to it was an industrial size box of condoms if that wasnt bad enough I dropped the clippers behind the bed and discovered hundreds of used condoms
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
listen i get youre a daddy dom but that doesnt give you a pass to make dad jokes
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
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