There was jim beam in your oven. I just preheated it.
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
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