He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
That's the saddest description of touching yourself I've heard since someone said "I was just lazily rubbing my clitoris while eating Cheetos alone"
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
I'm sorry I missed your birthday brunch. If it makes you feel any better I woke up wearing someone else's toga and a sombrero
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
Randomize
