I took my penis out way before I got to the bathroom and some dude kicked me out.
what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
Doing lines of cocaine in the bathroom and the word 'better' do not belong in the same sentence.
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
Randomize
