I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
how thoroughly do i need to sanitize the cone the vet put around my dog's neck for it to be safe to use as a beer bong?
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
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