it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
i woke up to my roommate spraying cooking spray on my legs. fourth time this has happened. not cool.
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
there's chocolate cake in my bathtub.. I don't even want to know how the hell chocolate cake wound up in my tub..
Last night I texted her to confirm she could start designing costumes for my show this week.
That is one convoluted booty call.
everyone thought he was too sick to make it, but he showed up. Ten minutes in and he's doing vodka shots with nyquil chasers
trading diseases for a hangover? that's either a really good decision or a really, really bad one. we'll find out if he wakes up tomorrow
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
He was all “please don’t bail because I’m missing work for this” last night
Honey no, I need dick. I’m not going to bail
Randomize
