in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
I just slapped myself in the face with my dildo and I know that's a weird thing to share but I just had to tell to someone omg I'm laughing so hard
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
Heeyy... sorry I got so drunk. You probably don't ever want to see me again. Thank you for dealing with me when I tried to jump over the deli counter for some mayonnaise.
Randomize
