My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
Just looked at my bank statement. 9 out of 10 transactions on the first page were from 9 different bars. The 10th was for birth control pills at the pharmacy. I need to rethink my lifestyle.
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
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