so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
Randomize
