bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
SHE BROUGHT HER PARROT TO THE PARTY. IT SQUAWKS EVERY TIME SOMEONE VOMITS LIKE 'PARTY FOUL SQUAWKKKKKK'
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
Who the fuck watches Jessica jones and thinks I need to call a past fling?
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
Randomize