So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
dude i feel like at any given point 3/5 of that family is trying to fuck you
Rubbed one out while on hold to buy tickets to Disneyland. Feel simultaneously like a freak and strangely productive.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
Someone asked me what I was drinking, I was drinking rum, but I was also eating starbursts so i told them "daiquiris"
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
You offered him a “Sorry I Blew Your Brother” Blowjob. How does that make it right?
I promised him it would be better than the one I gave his brother which is really nice of me since their actually only half brothers and his brother is cuter
Randomize
