Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
how was your day?
fuck the small talk. are you bringing the liquor tonight or am i?
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
so I definitely just chased tequila shots with a biscuit covered in sausage gravy
Thats fucking manlier than riding a bear into battle
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
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