Dual....:-)
Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
I just threw up on my dentist
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
I looked at him all bewildered and he said, "what? I figured if it was under 30 seconds it'd be free."
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
He goes "hi, free today?" WHEN AM I EVER FREE ON A SATURDAY, I GOT HUNGOVER TO BE AND DRUNK TO GET.
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
It took 6 cruisers to bust the party last night. Cop asked if the theme was a beach party. I said I would fucking hope so with 8 tons of sand in the garage
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
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