Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
What's a nice way of saying 'I wish I hadn't fucked you.'
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
