but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
my being single is dangerous.
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
You tried to convince me you were sober by doing jumping jacks. For an hour.
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
Randomize
