If I could text you the sound of me vomming, I would.
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
I legit just woke up on my couch, snuggled up next to some guy who's wearing my roommate's pink bathroble. What the fuck do they put in those shots?
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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