I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!
Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
So I come back home and a huge flock of enormous vultures are on my roof
They're waiting for you to die
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
Remember that time I sent you a 5lb bag of gummie bears?
Like it was yesterday.
Apparently I had it on auto deliver. So whoever is at your apt is gonna gen an interesting delivery...
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
Always keep a stash of tequila in your work desk. That is like adulting 101.
The cat is stealing cigarettes and my vagina cures blindness. How's your night?
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
Randomize
