I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
Dammit. I drunkenly drank all my milk at 6 AM in a misguided stupor to prevent my roommates from stealing my milk.
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
I have aggressive nipples.
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
not ubering you a puppy
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
A real best friend would support the hoe in me. Not remind me of what happened the last time I slept with a boss
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
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