I feel like my vagina stays drunk longer than the rest of me. It's always super sensitive and hungry the day after drinking.
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
After she cried and passed out at four in the morning, I had a very lovely, very drunken conversation with her mother while decorating a cake into the shape of a penis.
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
Randomize
