At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
Randomize
