Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
Considering the fact that you wouldn't give me my cat last night because he was "destined for broadway", yeah, I'm accusing you of stealing him
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
Hi I am too sober and out of rum. Translation: I owe you some beer. Also, get better taste in beer.
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
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