You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
MAGGIE IS ON MY COUCH PETTING AN HONEST TO CHRIST ARMADILLO AND SOBBING INTO HOT CHOCHOLATE. WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO TO HER.
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
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