I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
An hour ago, you were stranded out of state, and now you're getting laid? You are a god. Whatever you do, don't ask her name.
She woke me up with an urgent call telling me she was rolling on Mollie and swimming in the ocean. I mean that's just great. If she drowns, I'll feel responsible.
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
Observations from Vegas: #1. Strippers pasties pose a choking hazard. #2. Best. Heimlich. Ever.
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
Randomize
